How can you make sure with absolute certainty that your team will function inefficiently, ineffectively and with the members at odds with each other?
It's easy. Just follow these 12 steps and you'll quickly succeed in creating a perfectly dysfunctional team.
1. Don't delegate
Don't trust your team with important tasks — and keep the interesting jobs for yourself. If you do delegate, micromanage your people to make sure everything is done your way. Don't allow others to develop professionally or they might become rivals in the future.
2. Have no clear vision for your team
Even if you have one, don't communicate it clearly. You can create confusion by having no clear focus or plan. Don't set clear expectations for individuals or the team as a whole. After all, what's wrong with the status quo?
3. Dominate your team
Quickly dismiss the ideas of others. Do most of the talking in meetings. Before asking anyone for their opinion, make sure everyone knows what yours is. That way, you can prevent people disagreeing with you in public. Create a culture of blame and shame when things go wrong, as they often will in your team, and never protect your team externally when this happens. Blame them and shame them.
4. Take the credit for the work of others
You are the leader, so any success must depend on the brilliance of your leadership. Make sure the people you report to know that you are the reason for any good work that's done. Take the credit for your subordinates' ideas to create a good impression of your own professionalism.
5. Avoid all conflict
Hope that any conflict just disappears. Try not to get involved in disagreements, as you might have to take sides. This could lead to some of those "difficult conversations" that you've heard about.
6. Be self-centred
Be selfish and egoistic. Take your holidays when you want, with no regard for the demands of the job. Enjoy all the perks your organization offers and on no account share these with your team. You certainly don't need to show any empathy with your subordinates. Disregard their needs or requests as unimportant or trivial.
7. Tolerate gossip
Take no action to deal with a culture of gossip. In fact, encourage it. Use it to secretly attack team members you don't like by spreading negative rumours about them. At the same time, spread positive rumours about yourself and your favourites. A poisonous atmosphere in your team could help ensure that no one has the power to challenge your authority.
8. Don't listen
Focus on ideas that support your own perspective. Disregard differing opinions and don't engage with anyone with whom you disagree. If anyone does disagree with you, don't listen properly. As they are speaking, work out in your mind exactly what you are going to say when they finish, and make sure you have the last word.
9. Be inconsistent
Change your mind often, depending on who you last spoke to, and give mixed, inconsistent signals to those around you. Leave your team guessing what you want from them. The confusion will keep your people on their toes.
10. Be inflexible
Have one management style your whole career. Be an unwavering, authoritarian boss. Don't bother to get to know your team members or what motivates them individually. Resist change. Sideline innovations and stick with what worked in the past.
11. Be a poor communicator
Don't inform people of decisions that have been made. Be surprised when team members don't understand what's happening. Don't give or seek feedback. People should know what they're doing and, as you are always right, you don't need feedback either.
12. Lie
To cover up any failings, be confident when lying and don't worry about the consequences. People almost never check, and it's surprising what you can get away with.
You may have worked with people who have displayed some of these traits. It really is easy to be a bad leader. Do the opposite of these 12 things, and your team will thank you for it.